His Passing On

Heard from my brother that a family friend's youngest son passed on yesterday morning. I think he was probably 16, or 18. Hubby suggested that we should pay a visit to the family since he has close resonance with the parents of the boy but I resisted, citing reasons that I am sensitive to energies and there is nothing that I could do for the family. For confirmation sake, I 'tuned' into his accident to make sure that there were Saints or Angels with him to help his transition; he appeared to have already been 'received'.

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So this morning, I went to Chezz for a hair treatment with Pauline in different cars. On the way there, I saw a signboard with the departed's name. Very suddenly, there was a calling in the heart to go to the house, hence the call to Adrian (the departed's cousin) - confirmed that it was alright to go at 12pm.

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So after the hair treatment, I left for their place which was really nearby. Was greeted by Uncle Addy, Yu Jeen, Sue Ann and then Aunty Josie. Aunty Josie just kept crying. Well, it was understandable. Through the conversations with Yu Jeen and Sue, it seemed that Aunty Josie was up and down.

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As I sat down outside with Yu Jeen and Sue, they didn't seem to mind to tell me how the 'death' happened. They did not seem to mind talking about their dear brother, Yu Vern at all. I kept still in case I could hear or see Yu Vern (the departed); in case there was something he needed, or wanted to say. But he was fine. I could not see him literally, but I saw him with 4 angels - 3 of his own, and the other was AAGabriel. He did not tell me much, but I had a sense of knowing that it was his decision to move on. I know, it sounds absurd that he would 'chose' to pass on. All I can say is that he was given a choice; and after witnessing what would become of him and his experience with his family after he recovered; he made his choice, with the Grace of God.

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We usually think that death is scary, or as a bad thing. The bad thing about death is not about that person passing on; it is the guilt that we carry towards the person who has passed on. It is the 'I quarreled with him this morning!'; 'I still have so much to say to him/her!'; 'I did not do good enough!' and etc that make us repeatedly beat ourselves up for the death of another. But if we had given our best to the one who had passed on, where can guilt exist? Surely, we must grieve over the loss. The question is, what loss? Yes, we miss that person because we can no longer see or touch or hear that person anymore as we had earlier taken granted for. But really, if we had taken for granted their existence already, what made us think that we would not revert to the same old patterns when they'd recover from any misfortunes encountered? So, really - is that person gone? really really gone?

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The 'missing another' is the guilt we possessed and the attachment that we have. Can we love without attachment? It's possible, but difficult. If you love unconditionally with detachment, there would be no space for guilt to surface. There is no sadness, anger or hatred but only love, appreciation and respect. If you knew that the departed was really just going 'Home', would you still moan or would you then celebrate his 'return'?

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My experience during my time with the family was that I was an instrument to bring certain understanding to the family. It was strange, because I consciously knew that I was not there for the departed (what could I do right?), but more for the living ones. For they are the ones who must get over the 'death', they are the ones who must move on and continue to live their lives and they are the ones who must, in somehow or another, understand that this 'death' is not about blaming, not about guilt, not about whys.

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AAGabriel & AAAzrael, I asked that Yu Vern's journey Home be smooth. Please make him feel comfortable and loved when he is Home. AAHaniel & AARaphael, I asked that his family - Uncle Addy, Aunty Josie, Sue Ann & Yu Jeen be blessed in God's grace and embrace for their own journey of recovery. May love, light and support be onto them each time they think of Yu Vern.

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Thank you.