Old Patterns

Old shit have been surfacing one by one... in a quite back-to-back experience too. I think they are probably from the same 'root', but don't matter.. the experiences all suck and the feelings are all shitty. So much of judgments, blaming, disgust, anger, irritation... goodness... it reminded me of the time when I was hormonely imbalanced (PCOS). Maybe, my period is just coming.. who knows, and who cares?!?!?!

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This whole phrase of what I am going through makes me feel very 'dramatic' if you know what I mean. Although on the outside I may seem calm, bored or alright in whatever context (cause I am still going around doing 'normal' stuffs), I can tell you that the turmoil within is turbulent!!! Again, don't matter, because it has nothing to do with anyone else. When I told hubby about how I was feeling, he tried to comfort me.. and so did Angel, but... it just doesn't work, like before.

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And amazingly, my usual 'willingness' to practice Forgiveness (the real type and not the old-fashion type) seemed to have disappeared into thin air!! It's like, gosh... so much resistance to even recite those words inside, what more say it!!

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Hmm... could it be that the ego is battling with the ego? well, whatever! I just don't feel like interpreting anything. Just want this phase to pass... maybe, it is just a passing cloud.. and all I need is to be mindful. I find it quite difficult being mindful to a kind of blurriness.. kinda takes an extra effort to watch it, if you get what I mean, because it feels like as if I am in a a dream state.

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Anyway, I am just ranting. Old patterns or new patterns, ancient or not, it is all happening NOW. So I've just got to embrace it and be with it... sighs.. it only it didn't 'taste' so bitter...

Dad's 59th Birthday

It's Dad's birthday today. Oops... yesterday... Aunty Amy & I had "lui cha" breakfast with him this morning at a nearby shop in KK. Although the time spent was limited (because I had to rush home to pick Thea up for class), I treasured every moment of it.

To top it up, he accepted graciously the appreciation gift I got for him for his birthday :D! I bought him a DVD about traveling around the world... he loves traveling. And he promised Thea that he would bring Thea to school one day... this, I gotta experience!!

Came evening, we met at Taman Rashna, Klang for dinner to celebrate his birthday. Accompanying us, were the people from a temple he is closely associated with, Uncle Jimmy, Shirley, Aunty Amy, Aunty Nooi & Pauline's family.

Thea & Dad.

I absolutely love this picture! Dad & Thea just look so happy!!
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Dad & Thea cutting the birthday cakes together.

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Dad had 2 cakes - one from Sans Terri Cottage and the other from our nearby bakery in a shape of a teapot. Aunty Nooi (one of my aunt) asked me if I was trying to imply that he is very naggy and 'long-gas' like a "cha pou" (teapot - a saying in Cantonese to symbolise someone who is long-winded). It came to me as a surprise because it never crossed my mind until she mentioned it. I chose the teapot because Dad loves to drink Chinese tea! Simple as that! No hidden meaning at all! hehehe... funny how we usually put an implied meaning into things, which are just, THINGS!! But then again, I am not sure if that was what my subconscious was projecting. If it was, then it's time to do more 'homework'! haha..

I don't really know all the names of the people from the temple, but the people in the picture are mainly the people from the temple, then there's Dad, Shirley and Uncle Jimmy.

Our family photo for the night.

Left to Right: Bee, Jon, Pauline, Thea, Dad, Me, Aunty Amy & Aunty Nooi

Happy Birthday Daddy... I wish you love, calmness, peace, abundance and all that's your birth right...

I love you. :)

Jon & Pauline's Wedding Reception

I know this is a little late, but there is this saying that late is better than never, right.. hehehe

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Jon & Pauline's wedding was held on 19th September 2009 @ Sunway Resort Hotel.

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We were all there early to beautify ourselves for 2 reasons: a family portrait and also to be early to greet the oncoming guests.

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Dad, being a considerate host, smsing his friends their table numbers prior to their arrival.

Jon & Pauline

Jon & Pauline

The Family Toast.

In case you were wondering what happened to 'in betweens' of the dinner, I have absolutely no idea. Did you notice that hubby, Thea & I were not up on stage for the family toast? No... it is not because I am 'married' out and hence no longer part of the family... (DUH!!), it was because hubby and I (and a few others) were at the changing room calculating the ang pow gifts so that we could put them in the hotel security safe box. Because there were too much to count (or maybe because I was a slow counter), those that were in charged of the ang pows were not present in the ballroom for 3/4 of the night. By the time we finished, we were thirsty, hungry and tired... Thank God I did not attempt to be a bank teller when I was working in the bank!!

Anyway, just to shiock sendiri, this is a picture of hubby & I. And just in case you were wondering like Alina (she asked in my last blog if I permed my hair for the wedding), I didn't perm my hair for the wedding. My hair was 'set' if you know what I mean. I permed my hair 2 days later. :)

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The Captain & The Captain's babe. :D
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Jon & Pauline, wishing you both all the love, joy & happiness you both deserve for bringing so much of the same qualities to those around you.

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Pauline, welcome to the family. :)

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Wow!! I now have 2 sisters!!! Jay Lyn & Pauline!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!

Happy News!!

During my foot massage with aunt Amy and Paulie today, I received a called from Ryan! It has been a looooong time since I heard from him and guess what, he surprised me with a super-duper wowee good and happy news - Agnes (his gf) is 4 weeks & 3 days pregnant!!!! They just got out from the clinic when they called me! I was completely elated!!! The next best was when I found out that I was the first one that Ryan had called to share the news, I was moved to tears... You got me there, Ryan! hehehehe...

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Well, wedding bells ought to be ringing soon... can't wait!!!

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Congratulations Ryan & Agnes, so excited and happy for you!!! Wishing you both a wonderful and fulfilling journey together.. :D

Busy Quiet

Ya, I know.. I have been quiet since my last entry, but I assure you that is the least of what I experience since the last entry!

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There was my brother, Jon's wedding on Saturday - busy like hell (will update later when I get the photos).

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There was the day after my brother's wedding on Sunday - tired like hell.

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There was the day after the day after my brother's wedding on Monday - attended another wedding at night, so another pretty late night for us- ended up tired like hell (looks like I didn't recover well from the day before :{ )

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There was the day after the wedding dinner on Tuesday - spent half a day curling my hair (yep, I permed my hair!!!! :D) - tired like hell due to sitting on the chair for too long; slept late also, because I accompanied hubby to work late into the night (he was finishing off some management work while I was updating a website that I am currently working on). Oh yes, forgot to mention, went out with Bee too - for a shoulder & foot massage in SS15. Just for fun! ;D

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And today, is Wednesday - where classes officially start for Thea. Early morning for me.. *yawn* and did I mention, my aunt Amy is up from Singapore (for Jon & Paul's wedding) and is staying with me too. Will be bringing her to CnC later tonight.. yay!!! erm, after another round of foot massage first.. hehehe..

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Tomorrow right uptill Sunday will be filled with activities for me. I know this may sound strange - I feel tired, and more so in a daze. I can't see things straight and my knees are kinda weak (as if they would give way anytime soon). The feeling is as if I am in a dream, and despite the dream-like feeling, I seem to be quite awake and aware of my surroundings, and accompanying this awareness, is like a sort of detachment... Feels kinda weird. Ah well, it's just an experience.. whatever!!! :P

A little Nothing to share...

I feel that I've been busy, but not that kind of busy that you get something fruitful out of it. And I wouldn't say that it is fruitless either, but well... I can't really conclude it, except that they are experiences which could mean something, but ultimately meant nothing.

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Past couple of days, besides the insurance issue with my uncle (and resolved!!), my energy was relatively low. Went to see a Psychic with Thea and she shared some information which I found a little hard to believe but know that it was something that I'd used to believe in. I felt resistance in accepting it. It was crazy, because I found myself 'suffering' and really really low after that. Suffering not in an emotional or physical sense, it is something I can't really explain. I just didn't feel good, probably arising from lots and lots of resistance.

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Having a word with BB did not calm me and no, it was not because he did not say useful things; but more because my mind was closed. I was aware that most of the time while listening to him (I was attending a Wisdom Meditation class conducted by BB), I was experiencing glimpses where my mind was opened and closed, and then opened and closed again. This cycle went on throughout the session, until after the session I felt a release. I did not share this with anybody, not even my usual buddy, Angel. Don't know why... I guess it was because I was still not accepting of what was seemingly happening to me. Aah... the 'Me', always the cause of the suffering... *shake head*

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Anyway, yesterday was a day where I told hubby that I WILL NOT BE OUT DOING ANYTHING, although I was still doing something at home (at least I am home right?). Busy stuffs.. but can't remember what it was. Oh yes oh yes.... I filled my time watching a movie, read, the guy from Fujioh came over to service the cooker hood before I went out at about 530pm. At about 615pm I think, I made a decision - that whatever that was haunting me, keeping my energy low and etc etc... I will treat it as an illusion.

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I know, for some of you who have not been fed with such information, you'd probably be wondering what the hell I am talking about. And I don't think I will explain it here. Don't want to make my blog too complicated, since I am still in the process of drilling through the clouds of illusion.

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During the class conducted by BB on Wednesday, he confessed that he was walking 2 spiritual journeys, which resonated with me. At times I feel that way too... Angel said that there is something called the Middlepath - now, that made me wonder, could that be what the Buddha meant by 'Middlepath', instead of what we had been taught in the Buddhist context of what 'Middlepath' means. That, deserves some pondering.

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Back to the illusion bit, once I made that decision, surprisingly I felt better. There was an almost immediate switch from being energetically low to high! I chatted with Angel again and was laughing away... I was so happy! I even slept early!! (I've had trouble sleeping lately).

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And today, was another busy day - just with nails, nails and nails. My damn nails took up my time between 10am to 4pm. FED UP!! ARGH!! And now, my pointer still doesn't look nice ok!! GRRRRR.... Geram only...

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But you know what I was rewarded with when I finally took the time to drive up to Alina's house to pass her Jon & Pauline's wedding invitation card??? (and the reception is tomorrow!!), her freshly baked Buttercake!!!! Just plain buttercake!! It was simply awesomely delicious!!!! Girl, you can cook AND bake!! Hmm, you must be wondering about my excitement - I am not a chocolate or cake person; so when I say that a cake or some piece of chocolate is good - it's damn good!!!

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After dropping off the invitation, I went to collect the corsages for Jon & Pauline. Came back, had dinner, showered, talked to Thea a bit (she's not feeling well :( ) and then had to go out again to run some errands with Bee for Jon & Paul's wedding. Had a good laugh during the conversation with Bee. My brothers make me laugh most of the time; that is, when they are not irritating me... hahaa..

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So, this is an aimless entry - and it is 1040pm now. I could go to sleep (Thea's already asleep), but I think I will stay up to watch another movie and wait up for hubby.

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Nightie night and sweetie dreams...

Another Drama, Another Abundance

I finally managed to resolved my uncle's insurance issue for his new car; and then I received a call from the President of our Resident Committee sharing that another maid has ran away from the neighbourhood.

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At that time when I heard the news, I really don't know whether to thank God, laugh, or cry... thank God for the experience, laugh because I created it, cry because that means more work!! :{

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Anyway, I went about doing my own things today which had already been planned. Don't know since when (or maybe I've always been like that but never realised it), I was more concerned about ME rather than anybody else. When evening came close, I knew that it was a matter of time that I had to call the President to discuss about the matter. To make things worse for me, I didn't know how to operate the damn CCTV at the guard house, and didn't know how to link it to a viewable format.

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Met Kuna (the president) at about 8 something. We walked to the guard house together. He sounded the guards a little, I went to check out the CCTV. Nope, I couldn't do it. Just don't understand that darn manual. So I automatically dialed Kelvin's (the ex-president) number. He couldn't help. So I called Terence and Kevin and Keem. Terence and Kevin are from the same street and Terence was a former committee. Very very helpful. Keem left after realising that there was nothing that she could do anyway (seriously, I think it is a girl thing - when it comes to talking to guards and connecting CCTV to viewable format and all, girls just can't do it!). Terence and Kevin stayed on with us. While Kevin was busy sorting out the technicals, Terence took us to a possible escape route of the runaway maid. Now, Kuna and I 'pening kepala'...

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By the time Kevin got what was recorded on the CCTV to a viewable format on his laptop, we all watched the recorded movements together and concluded a few things. I think Terence left us half way through. At least we now know that the guards were not negligent.

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What is the abundance you ask? Friendly and supportive neighbours. :) They (Terence & Kevin) need not be present if they didn't want to. But they came over almost in a hurry when we called for assistance. So wonderful to have such beautiful and warm neighbours, isn't it?

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Anyway, it's about 1030pm now and I am already back for almost an hour. That means that we are quite efficient *winks*! heheheh... just kidding.. We were blessed, Kuna & I, with wonderful support from Terence & Kevin.

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Thanks so much, Terence & Kevin. You guys are really one hell of a neighbour!! Cheers!!

The Weekend Rendezvous

Had breakfast with in-laws.

Arrived at Malacca @ 1pm. Decided to have chicken rice ball for lunch.

Check out the crowd!! Luckily, my clever Uncle Stewart went to queue up first while we all parked our cars.

Delicious Chicken Rice Balls.

Thea making funny faces.

Wiped out Chicken Rice Balls. Btw, we had 2 whole chickens. ;p
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On Day 2, after we had Chicken Rice Balls for lunch (again!), we walked around before heading to Jonkers 88 for cendol, ABC and Assam Laksa. Mom said that it is very famous wor.

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The Assam Laksa, the ABC & the Cendol

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After 'dessert', all of them (as in - Mom, Chow, Uncle Stewart & Aunty Mandy) left for KL while hubby, Thea and I went to somewhere in Kota Laksamana (I think) to indulge in one of my favourite cannot-leave-Malacca-without-eating-it, Satay Babi.

Didn't managed to eat a lot with a full stomach, but my taste buds were definitely satisfied.


I took a picture of this so that next time, I can remember the name of this restaurant.
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Oh yes, forgot to tell you the reason why we went to Malacca.

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For them... Penny & Peng Weng. :)

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Congratulations on your union. May Love always be present in your journey together.

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Love you both. :)

A Guilty Day II = Abundance

I finally took my shower.

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As I washed my face, I realised that all that I had experienced today were a form of abundance.

• Abundance in the form of making an appointment (at a later date) with the Principal of first choice of school that we had in mind for Thea - so that she could allocate her time for us to give us her undivided attention and thorough explanations of what their programmes are all about.
• Abundance in the form of the warm and welcoming gestures of the Principal of the second choice of school we had in mind for Thea - so that we could be assured that Thea will be fine if she went to school there.
• Abundance in the form of test driving a Mazda 3 - the 23% improved version from the old model.
• Abundance in the form of test driving a RX 8 - a fast yet practical car.
• Abundance in the form of test driving an Audi TT - my supposedly dream car, which made me realised that it did not really make my heart skip a beat afterall because the drive was too refined though fast and smooth.
• Abundance in the form of spending the whole day with hubby and Thea - we had breakfast, lunch, tea; visited schools; and test drove cars.
• Abundance in the form of going through the disturbed process (my own creation, of course) of insuring my uncle's new car - acknowledging the weaknesses that I had and still being shown compassion and understanding.

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My uncle called again after my shower. He assured me that everything is alright and reminded that I needn't feel bad about it; and when I sounded like I was going to cry (which I really was going to), he laughed (his usual trick) to lighten the conversation. Thank you, Ah Ku.

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Looks like I have always been surrounded by abundance (though not necessarily in monetary form), whenever I am just willing to really observe and accept what is there for me.

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Appreciating it all. Namaste.

A Guilty Day

I had a really really bad day today, and it was all related to one simple matter that could have been settled since last Friday - if, and only if I was mindful. :(

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Yeah, the mindless me. :(

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My uncle bought a new car which required some additional accessories to be fitted in the car before it could be insured. Being the kind and supportive uncle that he always is, he gave me the business. Unfortunately, I screwed it up bad time for him. So he was not able get his new car last Friday.

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So I thought that Monday (today) would do him good... Alas, I got a call from him informing me that a lot of things that went wrong. Luckily for me that he is aware of alot of things that were not right, and unluckily for me, I carried the guilt of all that went wrong. It was all my doing. My being mindless, my being not aware, my being careless and my taking things for granted. All my doing!!

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Although today I did a whole lot of things that could have made my day (which were unrelated to the new car incident), but this one guilt of not being able to address the issue for my uncle (because I was out and about) really ruined my every waking moment. Hubby even commented that I sounded like I was going to cry whenever I talked to someone on the phone about it.

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So, today he was not able to get his car and he had to get someone to pick him up from JPJ KL from waiting there the whole day for his new baby. He was not able to get his car again today, all because of me. :(

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Guilt, guilt, guilt... I tried not to beat myself for it and knew that there was no where I could run. I wanted to just text him my apologies just in case I would break down and cry if I were to talk to him, but I thought it was not sincere enough. Because although I was expressing an apology, I was still running away. Ooooh, this terrible mentality.. and ooooh, this judgemental attitude!!

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I still hadn't really calm myself down. But I decided that I had to do it anyway. I had to admit my faults... so I made the call, finally. Believe me, I was alright when I started apologising, but when he said, "it is ok, Gerry.. it is just a matter of time. At least you've learnt something from this", I nearly broke down. I was touched by his compassion and understanding for my wrong-doings. I know, if he could show me that kind of compassion, I ought to stop beat myself up for my ignorance too.

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I still feel a little down right now, despite having breakfast with hubby and Thea, going to check out Thea's schools for next year, test driving a Mazda 3, RX-8 and an Audi TT (supposedly my dream car). I am so down that I don't feel like eating and I don't feel like talking. Believe it or not, I don't even feel like taking my shower too (I know, I know.. I am a smelly cat).

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I now realised that I've never been kind to myself despite all the things I've done to convinced myself so; and yes, I am aware of where it is coming from. But I just can't seem to shake away from it no matter how hard I try - the idea of Perfection; or rather, Imperfection. Whichever it is, these ideas are killing me.

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The next moment, is a new moment. A moment where I can choose again. Although there is nothing much I can do for my uncle for now, there is still a tomorrow where I could do something. Gosh, always the 'doing' instead of the 'being'. Looks like I've not got it yet. :(

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ARGHHHHHHHHH.........................

The Symbol

I am thinking of you. Thoughts of you swim in my mind.

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I don't know why. Perhaps, I do know...

the answer is there; but I am unwilling to look, because once I look, and know...

I might lose this feeling when I think of you.
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I am full of gratitude. I don't know if it comes from guilt...

Could gratitude come from guilt?

Oh yes, when it is only directed to you; forgetting me.

For which gratitude is genuine, except to myself?

Only when I acknowledge the appreciation of me, will there be genuine appreciation for you.

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So do I want to know? In some ways, I might; but in some other way, I don't.

I might lose this feeling, you see, when I think of you...

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My heart is bursting with expressions of love.

And these feelings are all associated with you... I think I love you. I know I love you.

But this, is only being rationalized in the mind – where ideas and concepts had conditioned the mind to conclude.

Is there a you? I do not know.

For if I did know, you'd disappear and these feelings would disappear with you.

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I want to let you go, and yet when I do; I am afraid I'd lose this feeling.

What if I never find it again? What if it is emptiness that fills the void?

But it is not right, for I now belong with another.

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If, and only if... I could love the one I am with, as much as I love you.

If, and only if, I could feel the similar gratitude towards the other, the way I feel for you...
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I know who is the culprit – the thought of comparison, the idea of lack.

And yet, I am afraid to look;

Because if I did, I'd know that it was not you that I had missed, and it is not you that I am thinking about.

You are just a symbol. You are just a cast. You are just my scapegoat, albeit in a 'good' way for whatever that I feel, or I think I feel;

I know, they are not real.

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Yet, why do I not see? Because I don't want to see.

Because if I had seen, then I'd know that I am alone, and that there has never been another.

I would have to take responsibility,

for this emptiness inside, this loneliness inside.

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And, I know you love me too.

And I know, that in some instances, these feelings might have been overwhelming.

But you are wise, because you already know. I am but only a symbol, for you to find what you thought you had lacked.

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Do I practice what you practice? I could when I see you do;

And when you transcend me as a symbol, my sufferings remain for I think you had left me.

I would have no where else to hide, no where else to go...

because of that transcend, you decline the role of my scapegoat.

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But you had not left me, and I had not left you.

Then where am I? Which decade am I in?

It is only when I rely on you as a symbol, seeing an outside; only had you left me.

So I will take that step, that courageous step now...

so that you, could always be with me.. because you, the symbol, had always been within me.
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First it would take that 'willingness' and then, that 'gradually'...

and then I'd come into the space, to reclaim and break the symbol you represent;

to be responsible, to be accountable;

to find out that there has never been emptiness, there has never been loneliness.

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There has always been Love,

and there has only been ME.

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This poem swam in my head this afternoon and took me approximately 10 minutes to pen it down.

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This inspiration surfaced from thinking of that someone, who had impact my life vastly, but gently.

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Thank you, that someone, I love you. Eventhough it is my own 'willingness' and 'gradually' -- you, in my space, had created that possibility for me to learn from you and various others, to transcend the many symbols in my life.

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Gratitude to you, and to me. Love, love, love... :)

The Potential Tai2

I promised LF last week to get her 2 x Joey Yap's feng shui calender. Since my date with Midvalley was cancelled, I relied on my dear mother to get it for me. Konon-lah, she forgot. But seeing that it was a public holiday anyway (on the day that my mom visited Midvalley), Joey Yap's office would have been closed anyway. So I got my other girlfriend, Terri to get it for me from Pavillion. LF mentioned Midvalley or Pavillion so since no Midvalley, Pavillion would have to be the next best choice since Terri works right opposite the shopping haven. Unfortunately, neither LF, Terri or I knew where to get the calendars within the vicinity of Pavillion, so I decided to take a trip up to Midvalley myself today to get it.

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I won't share the inner journey of the final decision of going to Midvalley, because it is all played up by guilt. But you see, I had a choice, as I always remind myself - reverse whatever my intentions are.

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So this morning, while waiting for Thea to finish her class, I went for a mani-pedi session with intentions to flaunt my beautiful nails at Penny's wedding in Malacca this Saturday (ya, I know, I know.. this is guilt too.. ;p). After Thea's class, I took her to lunch at Sakae. Lunch cost us both RM79++, can you imagine?!?!?! During lunch, I accidentally 'scraped' one of my beautifully painted nails.. so I told Thea, "girl, after lunch, mommi has to go repair the nail." She curiously looked at my nail and exclaimed, "mommi!! your nails are pink!!" Since we were at it, I explained to her what I did to my nails and she said she wanted to paint her nails too!! She decided on pink and blue.

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Yup, she did manicure too. It cost me RM15. She had her fingers painted pink and blue on alternate fingers. Ya, I know.. kinky. She was really amazed at what the lady was doing to her nails, filing, painting the base coat, colours and top coat, but finally got bored during the fan blowing bit. I took pictures. But please pardon the idea of laziness that hogged the mind, hence the decision not to upload the photos from the phone to the laptop, to this entry.

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And while she was doing all that, I got my 'scraped' nail 'fixed'.

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She looked great and was walking around with her fingers spread out because she was afraid that if she had accidentally hit something, the paint would come off! She was so cute.. at one point while we were walking towards the lift to our car, she said, "mommi, my face right here (pointing to the area of the face but not touching it) is itchy, please scratch for me." I burst out into laughter.. and after scratching for her, she pointed to another area of her face which required my service of scratching! Simply, simply adorable!!!

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We left for Midvalley. We took a while to find Joey Yap's office but soon found it, thanks to Angel's assistance. After purchasing the long awaiting calendars (which I had 20% off - aaahh.... what abundance), we went to San Terri Cottage for cake and cold coco. Beh tahan her (cannot stand her)... like a tai2 only... the way she ate her cake and drank her cold coco.. hahhaa.. I took pictures too and sent it to hubby, Bee and Pauline!! It was so sweet!!

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After our simple session of cakes and cold coco, we went to BB & LF's place to pass her the calendars. She was asleep and BB greeted us. While we walked up the stairs before arriving at their unit, she asked me, "mommi, where are we going?" I explained to her that we were going to my teacher's home - aunty Lai Fan and uncle BB's house. She responded, "oooohhhh..... uncle Ba-By's house..." hahahaa... I burst out laughing... she was just so so cute and adorable.. Unfortunately, when she saw BB, she did not greet him and shyed away from him. :{

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We weren't there long, since LF was taking a nap and both Thea & I were both tired. So we headed home. She fell asleep on the way back home.

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It is an interesting day. When hubby called and asked me where I was, I told him everything and he was surprised that I hung out with her the WHOLE day without the company of my girlfriends. He has this perception that I would either go to Midvalley alone or with my girlfriends, especially since today is Thursday - Gladys would be free.

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Well, I did something out of the extra-ordinary today, and had much fun and laughter. I remember times when I felt obligated to 'take care' of her whenever I am out with her alone and felt like she was a burden to go out with, alone. But today's event and experience really brought a new possibility to me on how I could actually enjoy my time with her, outside of home.

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I had a great time. And I am grateful for this experience. Much appreciation to LF for creating such an opportunity for me, to Thea for this wonderful day, and to myself - for giving myself the opportunity to experience this in a new light.

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Love.

Assignment

Hubby gave me an assignment to do - to help him type out a full chapter of one of the manuals he has to submit soon.

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Finished the job in 2.5 days with intervals of going out and hula-hula.. ;p

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Will be claiming my reward tomorrow. YAY!!!!!!!!!!! :D

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Damn, I am efficient.... ;p

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Love.

Lasagna

I baked lasagna on Tuesday. I had always wanted to try to bake one. I got all the ingredients ready and studied the recipe carefully.

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And guess what?

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I FAILED MISERABLY!!!!

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I mean, just take a look at it. The top layer was dry, it was not 'melty' like how a lasagna is supposed to look like (if you know what I mean), wet underneath and worst of Angel's nightmare... NOT ENOUGH CHEESE!!!!!

But surprisingly, hubby and bee (youngest bro) said that it tasted alright for a first timer! Even guardian angel said it was not bad. Hmm, I know.. I have too high of an expectation of myself. But to be honest, although the structure did not turn out exactly right, but I think the contents was quite tasty too.. haha...

I will attempt to try again until I perfect this art. Until then, hubby, bee and Thea, please be patient with me. And Angel, you too.. your cheese will be on the way... ;D

September Appreciation

Actually, I don't know if I'd put it correctly; but I guess it is not important. But in case, you don't understand it, this event was an appreciation meal for the September babies of C&C. Amongst them, is LF - one of my dear teachers. :)

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The venue for appreciation was at Organic Recipe. Seriously, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT attempt to go there by yourself WITHOUT a map, or with someone who knows the direction. You'd get lost - unless of course, you know where it is, or are familiar with that area. I am personally quite surprised at the number of restaurant outlets available along the way. I was already mentally making plans to bring hubby & Thea there for makan some day. Erm, yeah, some day... if I do eventually find my way there.. hehehe.. in case you didn't know, I am quite bad with directions. But that is besides the point - I just don't trust myself enough to based on my instincts to go anyway!

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Food was superb. Company, even better. I laughed so much! Everyone present really at fun - at least to my perception. One particular thing I remembered about the dinner was Danny reminding me to be careful of the bones in the fish (they ordered petai fish). I thought to myself, "how nice of Danny.. but I don't think I'd eat the fish cause I don't like petai." and blurted that out aloud anyway. And then.... I realised that IT IS A VEGETARIAN RESTAURANT!! HOW COULD ANY BONES EXIST IN A VEGETARIAN FISH?!?!?! I was a dumbass!! Everyone got the joke except me!!! Talk about being blur with a capital B!!

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Anyway, here's us. Not all of the fun team members are present, and I am sure it would have been a lot more fun with them around. But it was good for me anyway. I had a great great day!!!

Standing (L to R): Chew Fong, Swee Leng, Danny, Yoke Fong, Angel, Soo Lan, Lee Yuen

Squatting/Sitting (L to R): me, BB, LF, Boon Ling, Sian Sit, Ai Jou, Steven, the cat who just happened to stop by for a snapshot
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Thank you LF, for organizing such a fun-filled appreciation get-together. Love. :)

Birthday Marathon: Bonus No. 4

Remember I said I am very loved? Hehehe.. well, I am - at least by my friends. :)

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Remember that my birthday is in the month of July?

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On 25th August (I know this post is a little late, but late is always better than never right?? ;p), Belinda, Ming Yen & I met up at Pavillion for dinner again. Belinda was down in KL for shopping prior to her other shopping trip in Bangkok, so Ming Yen & I decided to meet up with her. You see, I was supposed to meet Ming Yen waaaaaaay earlier for my birthday treat, but I was just too caught up in the daze of lots of things... so the birthday event never happened, until Belinda came to the 'rescue'.. hehhee..

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We had dinner at La Bodega. It was awesome. Although I don't think we ordered a lot, but I felt really full after some leftover tapas which they had earlier (I was late due to massive traffic). As usual, we chatted and our main topic of the night were MAIDS!! Hahhaa.. all of us shared stories of our own experiences, of our friends' experiences, of our relatives' experiences and of our friends/relatives' friends' experiences.. hehhee.. it was a good suggestion, though just the fun. We continued the topic at some chocolate cafe. I can't remember what is the name of the cafe, but I didn't have any chocolaty. Only Latte - to have the caffeine digest my feeling of full-ness.. hahhaa..

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Anyway, here's the gift I got from Ming Yen.

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Of course, the real gift is not this. The real gift behind this gift is her sincere friendship. Have I ever told you? I've known her for 20 years. :)

Love you, Ming Yen. Thanks for always keeping me in your thoughts. And love you too, Belinda.. for including me in your To-Do list whenever you are in KL.

Morning Walk

I went for a morning walk today. Refreshing. :)

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It was my second time there (Kiara, Tmn Tun). The first time was with BB (which I'd initially wanted to blog about but ended up sleeping half of the day and decided to forget about it because I got stung by the lazy bug) and today was with a whole bunch of them. Danny & Swee Leng are really a sweet couple. Swee Leng makes me laugh ALL the time... hehhee..

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It was a great morning. Of course, I came back after breakfast and snooze again.. hahaha... See, told you I was going to have fun! ;)

A Tai2 in a Public Speaking Course?!?

Yup, that's what I did! I attended a 2-day public speaking course and had absolute fun!! I am very blessed because I was offered to attend the public speaking course for FREE!! So grateful and appreciative of the abundance! And one of the best part was being able to attend it with LF (BB's wife). I took it as an opportunity to get to know her better and also, to learn from her. Another form of abundance!!

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The course was conducted at C&C by this dude, Edmund Yap. He is one of the recent new regulars in C&C and seems to be an absolutely lively and enthusiastic kinda person!

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Before I agreed to attend the course, I had some visions that I would be doing some public speaking. No, no.. I am not aiming to be a candidate... it's like some role in introduction or sharing... I could just see it. But even if those were just tricks my mind was acting up, it was fine for me... because no harm acquiring another skill, or learning more right. Motto was FUN! So I said YES!!

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What I found challenging during the 2-day course was the topics that I had to choose to present my 'speech'. As you know, being a Tai2, I am not attached to any registered company, do not have anything to 'sell' or 'promote' and etc etc; yet, there were still things I could talk about!! Amazing. I spoke of myself, spoke of some shit analogy (which everyone enjoyed but totally missed the essence of my message), spoke of marketing plans for C&C, spoke of a proposal to 'business' associates of Clove&Clive and even iPhone! Overall, I think I did quite alright for a person who has absolutely no direction in life.. haha!! Could I have done better? Sure.. but surprisingly, I am not beating myself up for it! All I can remember now of the moments spent there is FUN, FUN, FUN!!

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Edmund is a pretty dynamic speaker. Although some of the examples weren't really in line with my current principles (whoaahhhhh.... I've got principles?!?!?!?), ok ok.. not principles, the kind of practices that I embrace; but he is pretty alright. Made everyone in class (albeit a small class) really comfortable and presented what he needed to teach clearly. Did I mention, we laughed a lot!!

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So, I had a fun-filled 2 days. I ought to be busy moving forward, but I am sure I'd be having loads of fun too..

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Love. :)