2009

It is now 4:37am. Yes, I am awake. I did sleep, but when hubby came back and required me to open the door for him; I am now having difficulty going back to sleep. Hopefully, after this entry, I will actually be tired enough to go back to sleep so that I could be alert enough for my new year breakfast with the gals.

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2008 ended with maggi mee as my last meal. We got back from Clove&Clive at about 11ish and I was hungry as I had an early dinner at 5pm. So as I finished my meal and watched AOD, hubby called to wish me happy new year! And it was then that I realised, time had crossed over to year 2009.

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It was really very ordinary, and yet quite special. Don't know why, it's like there was no need for a great party or gathering or any event to make it special. Just being exactly where I was, be it lying down texting or replying new year messages, or reading the encyclopedia to Thea was perfectly where I was supposed to be. Somewhat special in a weird way.

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A new year always starts off with a resolution. It's pretty sad that some people think that resolutions are a waste of time and don't work just because almost 90% of people don't do or follow up with it. Maybe it is time to have a resolution that you will actually do or follow up with? Or perhaps, if it was the wordings that somehow gave you an excuse not to achieve your resolutions, then perhaps change it (like what my dear ah neh, Mesh suggested) to a "To Do" list instead! Anything that would encourage you or kick your butt to achieve it! Because that is what you wanted in the first place and you do deserve every right to achieve it as long as you put efforts into it.

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According to the Oxford dictionary, "Resolution" means the quality of being resolute or firm; determination; a firm decision to do or not to do something. There, that explains it. If you are not firm about something, then don't list it down as your new year resolution. Similarly, if you are determined and firm about something that you wish to do, then list it down as a resolution! Simple!

Anyway, just to share. My new year resolutions for year 2008 and my achievements in relation to each and every one of them :-

1. To learn how to cook / bake one dish per month - it worked for a few months, but I lost interest because I realised that I didn't really enjoy cooking as a chore.
2. To exercise at least half hour every two days - it worked for the 1st week of year 2008 but I eventually stopped because of certain reasons (which of course should not be used as excuses). But hey, I joined a gym in October 08 and go to the gym at least thrice a week from then on (ok ok, except for month of December because Thea didn't have classes)! Thumbs up for me!
3. Spend more quality time with Thea - actually, this really shouldn't be a resolution but something that I should be doing sincerely from my heart, naturally.
4. Spend alone time with Jay Sheng at least once a month - yes, this is quite consistent.
5. Decorate my kitchen - I can't blame anyone but myself for not being creative. But I am proud to say that my kitchen is still in neat order. :)
6. To buy myself a branded handbag worth more than RM1,000 - Does getting a branded bag worth RM3,000+ as a birthday gift count?
7. Get pregnant by December 2008 - I would like to reserve my comments on this.

For year 2009, I have decided to have 2 lists. A new year vision and a new year resolution/"to do" list.

New Year Vision for Year 2009

1. To learn how to entirely trust myself
2. To honour and respect myself in all aspects
3. To love myself more and to accept myself in areas I have not done so
4. To forgive myself when I have allowed myself to be dishonest, a victim or in any unpleasant/uneasy feeling or situation
5. To do what I want to do, when I want to; contrary to doing out of obligation and/or fear

New Year Resolution/To-do List for Year 2009

1. To bring the orphanage project into fruition
2. To lose weight healthily to 51kg
3. To read at least 6 books of any kind
4. To visit Kuching either alone or with Ming Yen
5. To arrange a boating trip with either family/friends/orphanage (see who gets lucky!)
6. To learn to cook/bake 1 dish and 1 dessert well (yes, only 1 of each in the entire year; anything more than that will be a bonus! ;p)
7. To allocate time for a self-retreat at least once a year

There, easy to achieve targets; hah! or so I think. Difficult or easy, I guess it all depends on me. And I choose every possibility of achievement with love, wisdom, light and gratitude.

Happy 2009, everyone! May this year render upon you all beautiful opportunities of your dreams come true. Here's wishing you materialisation of your manifestations which brings joy, love, peace and light to yourself and those around you.

Just me. :) Peace out. (at least for now)