An Unhappy Neighbour

I just put down the phone with an unhappy neighbour bout half hour ago. He sounded really frustrated voicing out his concerns on the recent increase in our security fees contribution. The rates were all pre-agreed at the previous AGM, and the type-A owners who were present agreed to it (he is from type-A). Apparently, his wife who was also present disagreed, but no one heard her. Hmm.. I couldn't recall anyone objecting to the increase that night.. I guess I must have been in my own world.

He had his valid reasons and principles. Initially, when we heard of his dissatisfaction months ago, we could not understand why and the president then (who was a also type-A owner and now moving out of the neighbourhood) volunteered to speak to him. It sounded right. He was the president and he stays in a type-A too.. so same lingo should speak to the same lingo right? I'd be damned!! Not any form of communication was made with our unhappy neighbourhood. No wonder his tone of voice while we spoke on the phone!! So his unpleasantness remained unaddressed. Poor unhappy neighbour!

Just 2 days prior the new year, the streetrep responsible for my street resigned due to her personal commitments. Since there was only half year to go before the next term, I volunteered to take up the responsibilities as well (apart from being the President) since I was also a streetrep the term before. I figured that it was something that I could handle. And yes, it IS something that I could still handle. :)

Diligently, I text my friendly neighbours on my street to request for their contribution to the security fees fund. Response was pretty good. But I did not hear from our unhappy neighbour (he happens to be on my street too, you see), until today. He texted and asked for the name to be addressed in a cheque and presented that he would only contribute RMxx amount which was lesser than what was pre-agreed in our previous AGM. I replied via text if he could consider contributing the full amount instead. He replied explaining that he had written a letter to the Chairman to voice out his views and that he was standing by his principles. Hmm.. this was the an unhappy neighbour, it would be polite to call instead of smsing, I thought. 

The conversation was long. He was full of frustrations while trying to explain his rationale to his disagreement to the revised pro-rated contribution, trying to make me understand where he was coming from. I was mindful to listen to what he had to say and express, being mindful not to interrupt or defend what had been pre-agreed. He had his points. His views and ideas on fairness. A view that we (the previous & present committee) had not seen or considered. Coming from my understanding of his perspective, there was validity in what he said and felt. Thank goodness for my courage to make that call, I had learned another perspective into looking at this by putting myself in his shoes to see things. You see, the committee members previously and presently consists only of type-B & type-C owners and we did not have a voice from the type-As. To add to our ignorance and negligence, the type-A were the minority of the neighbourhood. He brought up politics as an analogy, which made me see how minorities are so conveniently forgotten.

With due respect to him, I apologised on behalf on our previous and present committee for our ignorance, neglicence and failing to see things from his view point. And I assured him that I would address this issue (since I am currently the President, right?).

I knew I was handling this right when the reflections came back like these...

When apology was expressed and his frustrations acknowledged

"I feel bad having to talk to you this way. I can feel it in my voice, but it is very frustrating not to be comforted when an issue is being brought up and not confronted."

When appreciation for his views were expressed and assurance was given that we will try our best

"Aiya, you are so nice until I also don't know how to go on talking about this."

When humility was expressed (I said that I was probably one of the youngest owner in the neighbourhood hence lacked the experience to serve this community up-to-mark)

"No, I don't see that you are young. I see that when you are in the committee, I see you as a potential leader. In fact, I already see you as a leader, that is why I am speaking to you about this."

When courage was shown and no parts of the conversation was taken as a defense or an attack

"I really appreciate you calling me and talking to me about this."

*The replies from my unhappy neighbour were not in exact words, but in what I could recall and perceive.*

Of course, after I hung up the phone, I knew that I had to write an email to the rest of the committees that this was something serious enough to address asap. Although the committee was solely set up for the purpose of coordinating the neighbourhood security, this was an unhappy neighbour who felt that he had been 'misunderstood', 'violated' and 'excluded' because he felt that he was not heard. We didn't want that.. oh no... As much as I am aware that we are unable to please everybody within the community, but we have to address the concerns of our unhappy neighbour because whatever points he brought up served as a lesson for us to improve ourselves not only as a committee but also as individuals.

I am grateful for my courage to pick up the phone to call my unhappy neighbour and I surely hope that he is feeling happier now after having expressed his view points. We've heard you, thank you so much for showing us another way to look at things. :)