A few times I met up with my Feng Shui Master, and without me having to say a word, he'd know that I am disturbed. Whenever he asked me what's wrong, and I'd tell him, he'd teach me this -detach. Easier said than done, because everytime the determination goes into first gear, someone would mention this person, or... I would somehow bump into her. It's just ironic, to the point of irritation. Thank goodness for support from hubby, mommi and some really beautiful and supportive friends. The strength to presevere paid off my sanity.
Lately, this person finally did texted and wanted to rekindle the friendship. I requested time to think about it and took 2 days before I replied her. Actually, I already know what I wanted, but I needed 2 days to carefully strategise on how to reveal to this person my decision because I didnt want any more misunderstandings, miscommunications or complications. I told this person honestly that it took me a long time to "get over" the friendship, and that too much has happened... so to be able to hang out like before would not be possible. However, I did assure her that I'd like to be in good terms because I feel it's kind of suffering when I am not in good terms with people that I know, and that's bad. Anyway, she graciously accepted the situation and I was glad. From that moment on, I felt my life more at peace. Like a heavy feeling lifted off my chest, shoulders and most importantly, my heart. Some of my beautiful and supportive friends actually doubted my capability in detaching myself from this person. But there I was, and still am - although only a few weeks - I feel better.. and I know that it is finally over.
So this evening was like this. Took some VIPs in my life to see Master. After his session with my VIPs, I asked to see him privately as I wanted to question him about this weird dream that I had about Thea. He smiled and told me not to worry.. and then it went on to me telling him updates on some parts of my life that he knew about. I reminded him about his advise to me on this person, and I reported to him my actions. He smiled and told me that that was a right thing to do and I did it well. I was very proud of myself, and I thanked him. For he was part of my support and my mentor in this situation, and many others when I was in doubt.
During my short conversation with him, he told me that he is sure that I have learnt a lot from the sessions that I've sat in with him, and indeed, I have. I am glad to be blessed with the oppportunity to know him, and to learn from him, certain simple values in life that most common people have forgotten and taken for granted. Although I am also proud of myself that I take the effort to give myself that chance to seek more positiveness and harmony in my life, I cannot deny that his lessons (although sometimes not directed to me) has influenced me and taught me well.
Seriously, not boosting.. I just love to help, and see people happy. But sometimes, I do it badly i think... and I guess my bad experience with some people had made me more weary of wanting to help other people. When he knew such fear in me... he told me that it was a shame... because I do have such a nature - a passion of always wanting to help others. In a way, I was ashamed of myself too, but I felt a need to protect myself for a while.... But through him, I have gotten over my phobia to help others. Well, he would argue that I would have to want to help myself first in order for him to be able to help me! hehehe.. well... whatever the case, I am a grateful being.. and I am a happy being too. Through these lessons, I have learnt to be more wise and selective.
Well, today is another memorable mark in my journey in life... where I now know that I am ready again, to embark with more challenges in my life. Although I dont know if people that I so willingly and sincerely help are able to benefit from anything that I give out, but I guess the most important thing is that I know that I have tried and it is up to them to evaluate and accept. It is, afterall, their own journey too.
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