First of all, thank you to my friends who messaged and called to show concern over my last blog. I am just so so blessed to still have good friends like you to care for me and to offer me your shoulder to cry on... Thank you so much again! And to give you all the peace of mind that I am alright (Geez... sound a bit perasan here huh? ), here is my update...
I think he could sense my unhappiness. On the way to 1U for dinner and some essential shopping, we talked about it in the car and boy, was he angry and mad over the things I had to say. We talked and talked and talked about it and arrived at no sensible conclusion, because we were both controlling our tone of voice and temper so not to scare our maid and the little one at the back. It was while we had dinner; when the maid took Thea out to see some fishes in this huge tank; he held my hand again and told me that he loves me very much and didn't like it when we have talks like these. I reminded him too that as long as I love him and hate these talks too, these issues had to be resolved because I was beginning to be affected by it and was feeling unhappy. We both agreed to approach these issues practically and not to let any short fuse throw in a "FINE!! HAVE IT YOUR WAY!!" kinda conclusion. However, when the maid came back, we stopped talking about the issue, had our dinner and walked around. He was being the loving hubby and daddi that he always was when we went around shopping.
When we got home, the maid put Thea to bed. We lazed around in front of the tv watching pathetic repeats of astro programmes before washing up and heading to the bed. When we both went to bed, we talked about it a little... and I blurted, that he doesn't ask me to dance. He replied that if I wanted to dance, all i had to do was to tell him, or ask him and we could arrange. But I argued... that he would arrange to play golf, or arrange to play badminton; why not a dance class or practice with me? I think by that, he understood what I meant. He hugged me and told me not to cry. He assured me he loves me very very much and that we will dance. So we went to sleep.
Sunday passed and came Monday. I woke up early to go to office. I expected him to sleep in, but by about 11ish, he called me, and asked me when I would like to dance with him, just like how he would call my brothers or his friends to ask them for golf, or badminton. Aaaahhhh.... those sounded like music to my ears. Of course, given my time contraints, I told him, "we'll see..." and his reply was, "anytime k... anytime you want to dance, you tell me then we arrange a day that you are free ok?" I was elated... Like suddenly, I matter to him again...
Maybe some people who read this may think it silly, that just over an invite of dance which may or may not happen, I am in cloud 9. But people who know me well, will understand that sometimes, this is all I need, to be reminded that I am still thought of, still a concern, still loved... Yes, I am assured of my happiness now. Because eversince that talk we had, we have made some compromises on his golf/badminton arrangements, time with family and time for us. I guess I made a mistake by bottling everything up, and he made a mistake thinking that I was ok with it all. Well, we all make mistakes, and I always count our blessings for always having the opportunity to realise them and to amend them.
Thank you hubby, for your effort and time to reassure; and thank you very very much, for loving me, and still wanting to be in a blissful marriage with me. I love you very very much.
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